Acting Out in Hurtful Times

Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you. Ephesians 4:31-32

So, this week I let my feelings get hurt, and I acted out in silence.  I’m sure you know what I mean by acted out in silence. My thoughts were to treat that person the way I felt I was being treated. 

Not tell them they hurt my feelings but to act like I felt they were acting. Remember what Jesus said in Luke 6:31 – “And as ye would that men should do to you, do ye also to them likewise?” Yes, I failed at that this past week! But, what I loved about this week was that God didn’t let me stay in that state.  

God revealed to me that it wasn’t about my feelings getting hurt because that is bound to happen, but it was about how I acted while being hurt. It was about if I was still honoring Him during this time. I know, right? That stung. 

Because I wanted to stay mad and hurt and act like a victim, it’s our nature. But that’s what we must resist against our nature.    

My actions were not Christ-like at all. What I think God was showing me was that I could be Christ-like during the most hurtful times of my life. It’s my choice how I respond to those who hurt me. It reminds me of how God uses things and people in the chiseling process to mold us and shape us into His image. The question was, would I allow that chiseling process to take place during this time?  

I began to ask myself some hard questions. Was how I was acting during this time of being hurt honoring God? Is how I’m treating that person the way God would treat me? Am I following the command to love my neighbor as myself? Am I letting my feelings rule, or am I letting God rule? I know these are hard, cut to the core questions, but we need to ask ourselves these questions to be Christ-like in any given situation.  

I know that during these bad times, I seem to get blinded by the hurt and then the anger that follows suite. But I learned a valuable lesson this week. I learned that during these times, I needed to take a few minutes to gain perspective, ask myself those hard questions, pray and ask God to guide me in the way in which to handle the situation.  

I want to honor God in every relationship that He has placed in my life. To do that, I must be aware of my actions and allow Him to chisel me into His likeness no matter how much that may hurt at the time. He will always honor us being willing to be molded into His image. It reminded me of what Oswald Chambers said in his book The Love of God. He stated that “the fiery furnaces are there by God’s direct permission. It is misleading to imagine that we are developed in spite of our circumstances; we are developed because of them. It is mastery in circumstances that is needed, not mastery over them.”  

If you’re like I was this past week, I pray that you find comfort in knowing you’re not alone. We all go through tuff times where we lose focus of God during intense moments of our lives. But those are the times that we need Him the most. Pray and ask God to come into your situation to help you honor Him in your actions during this time.